The title refers to me. In reading and learning about what my children are dealing with, I have learned a LOT about myself.  The psychologist who evaluated B said that it was likely that my husband or I were gifted as well. I could see it in my husband, but I just think I have ADD. ;)   However I find that the more I learn, the more I realise I am definitely spirited and sensational!  It helps me be a more compassionate and understanding mother, remembering what I went through when I was younger, and what I deal with now. Being able to say "hey, I don't like this, and I need to stop..." not that they always listen! But modelling proper behaviour rather than throwing my own tantrum is a step in them learning how to do so themselves.

So anyway, I suffer from some perfectionist issues.  I have to physically restrain myself from "fixing" things at times, and let them learn and explore.  I have noticed B has these issues too - has since he was a toddler!  He refused to say a word unless he knew he was saying it right. He can't just leave something unless it's RIGHT. If someone else is doing something different than he thinks it should be, he physically shakes if he can't make it RIGHT.

It's hard, because I know how he feels. How do I teach him to move on, if I have trouble?

Today was a lesson for us and I think it went well. We made ornaments! Salt dough ornaments.

First we measured the ingredients. (omg Messy! *twitch*)
Then we mixed. (more twitching)
Then we kneaded. (I didn't do too well here, I kneaded it for them to a point. hah)

Then we rolled.  (FAILED that one.)
Then we cut two ornaments to be the official ornaments this year, and then I let them go for it. So we all win. I get my "perfect" and they get their fun.

When it comes down to it, my kids are clever, and it all worked out well.

At least, until the paints come out. *twitch*



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If you want to make your own ornaments, here is the recipe!

Preheat oven to about 125°C/250°F

1/2 cup salt
1 cup flour
1/2 cup water

Mix well, knead, roll out to about 3-4mm or so - thick enough to not break, but thin enough to bake evenly.  Cut with cookie cutters.

Bake for 2 hours. (yes, two) Let cool completely, and then paint with acrylic paints.

I've mentioned before that B is a very social child. Overly social in some respects. Doesn't understand the concept of "Stranger danger" at. all.

It worries me. When he was younger I worried he would trust the wrong person when he was older. Now I still worry about that, but I also worry that his feelings will be hurt. He's very sensitive, and doesn't really understand that not everyone is his friend, and not everyone thinks he's clever.

Doesn't understand that there are a whole mess of people who feel children should be seen and not heard. Who don't think he's clever and cute. So far, most of the people he's come in contact with think he's great, and it makes me happy that they're so open to talking to him.

B loves - LOVES - to have conversations with "growmups" because we have all the answers. Other kids don't know much about the workings of the world, and he needs to know everything about the world.

He knows how a piston engine works. He knows what the insulators on power wires are. He knows a lot of things that a 5 year old probably shouldn't...and if YOU don't know what it is, he is more than happy to tell you all about it. In detail.

Right now he's obsessed with Juicers. I have no idea where he even heard of juicers, but that's what he's all about lately.  Tomorrow we're going to someone's house who has a juicer.  I may have to warn her that she's going to have to answer a lot of questions... lol

My biggest challenge with B is to teach him how to appropriately share space with other people. He's very intense and often can't shift from his focus/need/interest to see what else is going on around him.

So in effect I have a social child who has no idea how to be around other people. Thankfully at the moment he's cute and young and people tend to love his thirst for knowledge. But I know that soon it's going to change. I'm going to get more "looks" and he's going to be getting more negative attention. Which will hurt his feelings.

I'm hoping that the people we are surrounding ourselves with, through the homeschooling network,  will give him a soft place to land. Where he can be himself, where the "growmups" will understand, because their kids are like this too.

I've been thinking of that song from Mary Poppins - the one Mr. Banks sings, about his "shed-yool"! ;)

Let's talk about schedules and routines. Do you have one? Do you stick to it? Does your *child* like it?

I am not a person who is tidy and organised by nature. I have mild ADD and I used to have to do a million things at once, so my work space was often cluttered as a result. I remember when I was working for a small law firm about 12 years ago, and I had my daily routine down pat. I had most of my work done by mid-morning and my filing was under control. It left me plenty of time to handle the "big jobs" my bosses threw at me, often at the last minute. I have Flylady to thank for that. While I never took it as far as she does, I learned so much from her about routines.

When we first moved back to this town a little over four years ago, again, I had a routine, and we did well with it. The housework never got completely out of control, B was 10 months old and we had a busy week with story time at the library, swimming, playgroup, and later, when he started walking, kindergym. It seemed so easy at that point!

Fast forward four years. We have moved into a much smaller house, we now have another child, and our own business, and a fraction of the income we used to have. To say it's challenging to organise life is an understatement. It's also against my nature. I KNOW I do well when I have a routine, but it's hard to get into one for me. I'm SO not a morning person. I mumble along in the morning, throwing food to the lion...er children, and holding my cuppa like it's a life line. On really bad days I start the diet coke right away. :P Somewhere around, oh, 11:00 I might perk up a bit and throw a load of laundry in and make sure the boys aren't leaving permanent marks on each other or any walls. Then I do *something* that needs to be done. Then I'm good. lol

However, in the back of my mind like the nagging wife I am not, is the weekly cleaning routine from the control journal I created years ago.  I still go with it, when I am motivated to. Mondays are our bedroom and office. Tuesdays are the bathrooms/toilet. Wednesday is the boys' room and laundry room. Thursday is Bin night, so I clean the kitchen. Friday is...um. Well, something I haven't yet done. lol

This doesn't work if you have a family and a business and lots (and LOTS) of STUFF.

This also doesn't work if you have a child like B that thrives on structure, even though he tends to resist it at times. Everything I have read has stressed routine. Not necessarily minute by minute, but things that happen in a certain order, every day. Meals and snacks at the same time, wake up at the same time, bed at the same time, etc. However B HAS to know what time things happen. Or he asks us eleventy billion times (<-- technical number, that!) and it drive me mental. So I have worked up a routine. I'm not sure who it's going to be hardest on, because I have to drag my bum out of bed BEFORE 7am if I want to get a shower in. *grumble mutter* I thought the whole point of working and schooling AT HOME was to not have to conform to anyone's schedule. PFFT! The things we do for our kids, hey?

Anyway - here is our new routine/schedule, starting tomorrow.

I colour coded different parts of the day - like times we eat (teal), time to play (purple) etc., so B will be able to find them easily. He can read the list, but he's still unsure of himself with reading, and I'm hoping this will help him find things on the list. This one will live on our fridge, but I've also written out some (sloppy) little cards for the mister's and my desks, so he knows where we are in the day, and what needs to be done if I am otherwise occupied. I have made my own schedule as well, for things I will be doing when the boys are having their playtime and nap/quiet time. It's going to be REALLY hard for me to do this, so I could use some moral support/productive vibes send my way!  I'm hoping to tackle some of my decluttering/organising projects during this magical "free time" I've scheduled in. That's a topic for a future post though! :)